Always Another Side Read online

  He could admit to himself he’d been falling for Tyler. The time they spent together had been easy, natural, and only three days without speaking to him was enough to make Jack miss him. They’d had plans to meet for lunch today, and at twelve o’clock Jack’s phone had chimed with the reminder he’d forgotten to cancel, and he hadn’t been able to eat anything after that. Surely that told him he needed to pull his head out of arse and sort this mess out.

  With a sigh, Jack rubbed a hand over his face. As much as he wanted to, he didn’t think he could look at Tyler and not picture him and Simon together. Not yet, anyway.

  Fuck.

  He snatched up his phone and called Zena back.

  “I thought you were ignoring me,” she said in lieu of a greeting.

  Jack sighed again and leaned back in his chair. “I was.” Her soft laughter brought a smile to his face, the first in what seemed like days. “But I’m done now.”

  “Good.”

  He heard the faint sounds of outside on the other end of the line, a car door opening and shutting. “Where are you?”

  “I popped into Tesco’s on my way home from work.” A faint rustling, then an engine starting up. “Why? Don’t tell me you’re still at work?”

  “It’s not even six o’clock yet. Don’t act so surprised.”

  The engine cut off again and Zena’s long exhale signalled Jack was about to get some unsolicited advice, and he braced himself. “It’s ten to seven.” Her voice was smooth and even, but Jack knew her well enough to detect the concern in her tone.

  He glanced at the office clock, convinced she was mistaken. “Shit.” Where had the last hour gone? Had he been staring into space all that time?

  “Why don’t you come round for dinner and we can talk about it?”

  “Tonight?”

  “Yes, tonight. In fact don’t bother going home. I’ll swing by and pick you up and you can leave your car at work. I have a feeling this is going to be a night that needs a lot of alcohol.”

  “I have work tomorrow.”

  “We don’t have to get wasted, just a few drinks. And I can always give you a lift in the morning. You’re only a little bit out of my way.”

  More like twenty minutes, but Jack was already sold on the idea. “Yeah, okay. That’d be great.”

  “I’ll be there in ten.”

  They hung up, and Jack had to admit he felt better already—the prospect of not going back to his flat lifted his spirits no end. His phone sat heavily in his palm—there was someone else he should call. More times than he could count, Jack had thought about dialling Tyler’s number or even texting him. He’d put it off each time, unsure of what to say. But not contacting him at all wasn’t fair either. Jack had no doubt Tyler was feeling as shitty as he was. Before he could talk himself out of it, he scrolled through to Tyler’s number and hit the call button.

  It rang and rang, and Jack was convinced he’d be talking to Tyler’s answer message when a breathless Tyler answered.

  “Hello?”

  Jack’s smile was immediate; it was so good to hear his voice. “Hey.” The pause and hitch in Tyler’s breathing had Jack gripping his phone tight. “I’m sorry it’s taken me until now to call you.”

  Tyler sighed and Jack pictured him rubbing his eyes behind his glasses. “I understand.”

  The silence felt strained as it never had before, and Jack hated it. “I just… I don’t know what to say.” Tyler sighed again, and Jack wondered, not for the first time, whether Tyler was having second thoughts.

  When Tyler spoke, he sounded resigned but not angry or cold, and Jack clung to that as he listened to what he had to say. “I know how hard this is for you…. Well, I guess I don’t exactly, but it’s not easy for me either. I slept with the man you trusted, and willing or not, I was involved in your break-up. The thought of that makes me feel physically ill, so I can only imagine what effect it’s had on you.”

  Jack’s chest tightened. The words hurt but maybe they needed to be said. If they couldn’t talk about it, how would they ever get past it? “It wasn’t your fault.”

  “It wasn’t yours either. But it happened and it’s not something either of us can brush under the carpet and ignore.”

  Silence again, but this time Jack felt the strain ease a little. Talking was good. Lack of communication had been at the root of his break-up with Simon—that and Simon’s inability to keep it in his pants—and Jack wasn’t about to make that mistake again. The conversation might be painful on both sides, but avoiding Tyler was doing them no favours either. After that realisation, the rest came easy.

  “I’d like to see you. For lunch or coffee maybe,” he added hastily, not wanting to give Tyler the wrong idea. They needed to start slowly, build the pieces of their relationship back together.

  “I’d like that.” Tyler’s smile was evident in his voice, and something loosened in Jack’s chest. “When did you have in mind?”

  The weekend felt too soon. Jack wanted a couple of days to himself—away from work and other distractions where he could let this sink in fully and process how he felt about it. But he didn’t want to leave it that long before talking to Tyler again. “How about we meet for lunch on Monday?”

  “I can do Monday.” Tyler’s disappointment was clear, and Jack hurried to reply.

  “But I’d like to call you again before then if that’s okay?” Much to Jack’s relief, Tyler laughed softly.

  “Of course it’s okay. You can call or text me whenever you like. You never have to ask.”

  It was Jack’s turn to sigh. “I didn’t want to assume. I mean I asked you for space, and—”

  “And you were right. I think we both needed some physical space, and time to sort this mess out in our heads. But I don’t think that means we have to avoid all contact. Do you?”

  “No.” Jack’s shoulders sagged and he rested his head on the back of his office chair. Thank God they agreed. His phone beeped to signal an incoming call waiting, and he glanced at his phone to see Zena’s name flash up. Shit, he’d forgotten about her. “Sorry, I have to go. Zena’s coming to pick me up from work and I was supposed to be downstairs already.”

  “Okay. I’ll talk to you soon. Have a good night.”

  “You too. Bye.”

  He pocketed his phone, turned off his PC, and scooped up his keys and wallet from his desk drawer. Zena sat in her car waiting outside the office doors as he hurried down the stairs to meet her.

  “Sorry.” He got in and buckled his seat belt before facing her. “I was chatting to Tyler and I—” Her face broke out into a huge smile and Jack rolled his eyes. “Stop looking at me like that. We were only talking.”

  Her smile dimmed slightly but didn’t disappear. “And?” she prompted as she pulled away from Jack’s building.

  “And I’m meeting him for lunch on Monday.” He held his hand up as she opened her mouth. “It’s not…. We’re not…. It’s just lunch.” He finished lamely, not sure how to describe what he and Tyler were at the minute.

  She reached over and patted his thigh. “I’m glad you’re talking to each other.”

  He settled back in the seat and smiled. “Yes, me too.”

  Friday afternoon came and Jack was out of the office by five o’clock on the dot. Spending Wednesday night with Zena and Mark had done him the world of good—he hadn’t talked much about himself and Tyler, but it had served as a great distraction to take his mind off everything.

  One particular conversation stuck in his mind, and he pondered it as he drove home. As usual, Zena had cut straight to the chase.

  “Really it comes down to one question. Can you accept that Tyler and Simon were a thing or not?”

  Jack had argued it wasn’t that cut and dried, but maybe it was.

  His phone rang as he unlocked his front door. One quick glance told him it was Sarah, his estate agent, and he almost dropped the phone in his haste to answer it. “Hello.”

  “Hello, Jack. I just got off the phone
with the vendors.”

  “And?” His heart beat furiously as he waited for her answer.

  Unfortunately her soft sigh said it all. “I’m afraid they declined your offer.”

  “Oh.” The initial offer he’d put it had been ridiculously low, and Sarah had told him there was a strong possibility it would be rejected, but he still got his hopes up.

  “Don’t get too disheartened. I think it was a touch under what they’re willing to take. They asked for fifteen thousand more.”

  Jack scoffed. “Did they, now?” He closed the door, kicked off his shoes, and hung up his jacket, passing his phone from one hand to the other in the process. “So, what now?”

  They discussed what Jack was prepared to pay for the house, and decided to counter-offer with an amount five thousand under that to give them some room to manoeuvre.

  Ugh, Jack hated this back and forth, and he felt the beginnings of a headache forming.

  “Okay, I’ll get back to them with your new offer and let you know what they say. I probably won’t get a response until Monday, in my experience people like to take a few days to think about things. But you never know.”

  Jack thanked her and hung up. He unbuttoned his shirt as he walked down the hall to his bedroom. The week had been long, and he wanted nothing more than to change into something comfortable, then sit in front of the TV with food and a bottle of wine.

  His phone rang again as he was pulling on his pyjama bottoms.

  Christ, that was quick.

  He snatched it up off the bed, thinking it was Sarah calling back; he didn’t bother to check the caller ID. “Hello.”

  “Hey.”

  The voice that greeted him wasn’t Sarah, though, and it took Jack a second to realise it was Tyler. “Oh. Hey.”

  A long pause followed, and Jack wanted to kick himself. Had he sounded disappointed? Shit, he hoped not, because he wasn’t, just surprised. “Look, I’m sorry—” he tried, at the same time as Tyler said, “I shouldn’t have called, I’ll just—”

  Silence again.

  Jack took a deep breath and prayed they hadn’t gone back two paces since Wednesday. “I’m glad you called.”

  “Really? You didn’t sound it.” Tyler seemed sceptical.

  Jack imagined the disgruntled look on his face and smiled despite everything. “Sorry about that. I was expecting a call back from the estate agent, and I thought you were her.”

  “Oh.” Tyler sounded less affronted this time. “Understandable, then. Was this about your offer?”

  “Yep.” Jack relaxed when he heard the open curiosity and concern in Tyler’s voice, pleased they could still navigate a potentially tricky situation and take each other’s words at face value. “They rejected the first offer, and so I put in a counter-offer.”

  “I told you it was too soon to celebrate.” Tyler laughed softly, the sound like a soothing balm to Jack’s ears.

  He smiled in response and sat down on his bed, flopping onto his back. “Yes, you did.” The thought of what else happened that night sprung to mind and Jack hastily changed the subject. He didn’t think that was a topic they should broach over the phone. “Is Deb all set for tomorrow? I think they’re coming round about two o’clock.”

  The landscape gardeners Jack had put her in touch with were coming to see her in the afternoon, and the last time they’d visited her, she’d been itching to get everything started.

  “Yeah, she sent me a text about it yesterday. She’s very keen.”

  “Well, I hope they can produce a design she likes.”

  The line went silent again, and Jack wished he could see Tyler’s face, to try and read how he was feeling. He’d wanted this time apart, and he still thought it was for the best, but it didn’t stop him missing Tyler. He’d take that as a good sign. “What are you up to tonight?”

  Tyler sighed. “Nothing much. Aaron’s coming round soon—” The doorbell chimed as if in response to Tyler’s words. “—in fact that’s probably him now.”

  Jack took that as his cue. “Okay, well, I’ll let you go then. Still all right for lunch on Monday?”

  “Yeah.” Tyler’s voice dropped an octave, and whether he was trying to be seductive or preventing Aaron from hearing, the husky sound went straight to Jack’s groin. “I’m looking forward to it.”

  Jack swallowed and absently palmed his cock through his pyjamas. “So am I.”

  He lay there on his back long after they’d hung up. His flat seemed empty now after he’d got used to having Tyler in his space so often. Their last night together nudged at his mind again, and this time he let it in. Avoiding thinking about Simon and Tyler together wouldn’t make it go away. If Jack wanted to get past this—and there was no question that he did—he needed to approach it head-on and let it work its way out of his system. And that meant thinking about what had happened between them, and examining how he felt about it.

  He hoped he’d bought enough wine.

  Chapter Sixteen

  “Was that him?” Aaron gestured at the phone in Tyler’s hand.

  Tyler’s smile was bittersweet. “Yeah.” He led Aaron through into the kitchen and offered him a beer.

  “Thanks.” Aaron took it and had a long drink before tilting the top of the bottle in Tyler’s direction. “So, how’s it going between you two?”

  Aaron was the only one Tyler had spoken to about what had happened. After Jack left on Sunday morning, Tyler had texted him the bare essentials, and unsurprisingly Aaron had turned up an hour later with a MacDonald’s—his usual hangover cure—and a sympathetic ear.

  Tyler took a sip of beer, wondering how to explain where he and Jack currently were. “I think we’re getting there.”

  Aaron raised an eyebrow. “And where is there, exactly?”

  “Past all this crap with James—I mean Simon, or whatever his fucking name is.”

  Maybe Tyler wasn’t quite past it all yet. He’d managed to put it behind him once, but now it was open again, like a gaping wound that wouldn’t heal. The whole thing was tiring, and he’d had enough.

  “It’s not only Jack who needs to get over this, is it?”

  “No.” Tyler sighed and looked down at his feet, not wanting to meet Aaron’s eyes. He knew what he’d see there—Aaron had got to the point where he didn’t sugar-coat things anymore where James was concerned.

  “I know you’re sick of hearing this. Fuck knows I’m sick of saying it.”

  “Doesn’t stop you, though,” Tyler muttered, and Aaron laughed. When he looked up, Aaron was gazing at him fondly.

  “No, it doesn’t, because you’re my best friend and I love you. But….”

  Tyler groaned. “But?”

  “I’m going to be honest. James was a dick to sleep with you and lead you on while having a long-term partner. He lied to both of you. Should you have seen through his bullshit and excuses? Maybe, but that’s easy to say in hindsight. Tyler, you can’t blame yourself for wanting to believe in someone you were falling for. And you can’t allow Jack to blame you either.”

  “I’m not.”

  “Aren’t you?” Aaron set his beer bottle on the counter and slipped an arm around Tyler’s shoulders. “Because it sounds to me like you’re waiting for Jack to forgive you, when you did nothing wrong.”

  “Yes, but—”

  Aaron shook his head. “But nothing. That guy was a dick to both of you. He lied to both of you. Yes, maybe Jack is the one who’s hurt most, but that doesn’t make it your fault.”

  Tyler tried to take Aaron’s words to heart, but the guilt remained. “It feels like it is.”

  “I know.” Aaron gave him a squeeze before letting go and reaching for his beer again. “That’s because you love him.”

  “I do not.” Tyler’s reply was automatic. He’d refused to inspect his growing feelings for Jack, especially after what had happened. It made everything hurt more. But the flush on his cheeks said otherwise.

  “Mm-hmm. Of course you don’t. That’s why yo
u get starry-eyed every time you mention his name—which is all the bloody time by the way—even when it’s only to tell me you have a lunch date.”

  Aaron batted his eyelashes when Tyler glanced up at him, making Tyler smile.

  “Fuck off.” He elbowed Aaron in the ribs, but his heart skipped a beat as he let himself think the words.

  “It’s true, and you know it.”

  Tyler always jumped in feet first with every relationship, but this was different. Over the past few weeks as he and Jack had looked at houses, Tyler found himself wishing they were looking at a house for the two of them together and not just for Jack. The thought had startled him enough that he’d tamped it down quickly in case Jack noticed, but the feelings were there whether he wanted to open up to them or not.

  He was in love with Jack, and that was why the thought of losing him hurt so fucking much. “Shit,” he whispered.

  Aaron clinked their bottles together. “Yep.”

  Tyler woke Saturday morning and gingerly sat up. He didn’t think they’d drunk enough the night before to warrant a hangover, but he’d been caught out like that before. His body had become more unpredictable as he got older. Thankfully, apart from a dry mouth and a slight headache, he seemed to be okay.

  The shower was running in the main bathroom, so that meant Aaron was already up, and Tyler knocked on the door as he walked past. “Breakfast in fifteen minutes if you want it?”

  “Yeah, I’m starved. I’ll be out in a sec.”

  Aaron stopped over now and again when he was either too tired or too drunk to go home, and Tyler was always glad of the company. Not that he minded living on his own, but having someone to share breakfast with at the weekend made a nice change. He’d got used to waking up with Jack on at least one morning, and so he was especially glad to have Aaron there today.

  “Hey.” Aaron sauntered into the kitchen ten minutes later, wearing an old, comfortable-looking pair of jeans and a fitted black T-shirt.

  Aaron always looked good, his body made for clothes of any style, and Tyler used to be a little envious of that when he was younger. After Tyler’s shoulders filled out more and he started exercising regularly, he didn’t care quite so much.